While migrating saved blog posts in 2020, I came across this one; it is not currently on my old Blogger blog and I’m not sure if it ever was.
Why, Paul! What are you doing up at 3:30?
I’m up because yesterday I took Sam to the grocery store with me.
Huh?
At the grocery store, after I bought some groceries, he got in line behind me and bought a pack of gum.
And?
I warned him that he was allowed to buy gum with his allowance, but if I found it all over the house, he wouldn’t be allowed to buy gum anymore until he was old enough to leave home.
And?
Last night, before bed, his little brother Pippin found the pack of gum.
And?
Pippin ate the gum.
You mean chewed the gum?
No… chewed it up and swallowed it. The whole pack. And, I surmise, a lot of macaroni salad, and then went to sleep. So… I’ve been cleaning the floor.
And?
The drawers under the bed.
And?
And a bed frame.
And?
And the mattress.
And?
And pillow.
And?
And bedclothes.
And?
And his siblings.
And?
And his clothes.
And?
Our bed, too.
And?
His hair.
And?
Him.
And now?
I’m cautiously sipping some water, sitting up, and wondering if I am going to vomit myself.
So?
So… lesson learned… don’t take Sam to the grocery store?